Category Archives: Fantastically Wealthy

Certified Cowboy

Hey dudes! We’re two books into cowboy month! Actually it will probably go a bit longer than a month because I have SO MANY cowboys in my corral thanks to Harlequin’s leap day cowboy sale. The only thing I love more than cowboy romance novels is not paying full price for cowboy romance novels, AM I RIGHT OR WHAT? Actually that’s not true. The only thing I love more than cowboy romance novels is their covers! Oh boy, what is going on with that pony? Not his best angle. I also really enjoy the cowboy’s face. He makes riding a bucking horse look effortless – like, really, he’s putting no effort into it. He might as well be sitting on a couch. Also is it just me or is he gazing longingly at his own crotch?

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Long, Tall and Tempted #2: Paper Husband

Oh boy, do I have a goodie for you! For novella #2, in this week’s installment of How I Learned to Stop Worrying About Being a Human Being And Decided to Just Go Ahead and Lower My Standards, we follow the burgeoning love story of Dana and Hank.

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Long, Tall And Tempted #1: Redbird

WELCOME TO COWBOY SEASON!!!!

This little guy – I mean, BIG guy! Great big huge guy! So big! It’s a good size! – is more of a romance novella than a romance novel. It’s very short (no offense!!!!), but it comes in a collection of 3, all of similar length (which is fine!), so all together they give the appearance of being a regular-size book. Which is…fine. Look, frankly, it’s not very satisfying. OKAY I SAID IT, ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?!

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Just Like Heaven

I don’t know about you, but I have a good feeling about 2012. Just something in the air that speaks to me of good tidings. Also, I’ve gotten some sweet-ass book recommendations that I can’t wait to grumpy-read for you! I kid, I kid, I’m sure some of them will be lovely. Just lovely.

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A Christmas Promise

It’s Christmas Eve! Happy Christmas Eve! Also, Merry Christmas Eve! More Capital Letters!!!!

Instead of putting up a quick excuse about how there’s no new post today, I figured I would share with you a very special Christmas Episode of Romance Recap. Also, this little Christmas-themed novel gave Mary Balogh the chance to make up for her dreadful Novel That We Won’t Discuss from last week. Is Mary Balogh destined to become the second name on my Romance Authors To Avoid list? Or is she actually a nice lady and just had a rough novel?

In the spirit of Christmas, let’s read her book and judge the shit out of it!

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A Precious Jewel

This book is my punishment because I read an amazing book this week (the day I started it, I went straight home from work and read all night until I finished, it was that good) (it’s called The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake by Aimee Bender and it was wonderful and when I finished I sat on the couch and tried not to weep into my hands) (SO GOOD) and now the universe is like, fuck you Cate! Stop having such a great time reading books and shit! Stop having such good taste! Ughhhhhh. I’ve really done it now. I’ve read one too many excellent novels and now I’m being punished with THIS drivel, which by the way I found at my parents’ house so thanks a lot, Mom, this all your fault!

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An Affair Without End

This book is sort of infuriating in a lot of ways. For one, the print is SO SMALL. Like, teensy tiny. What am I reading here, high-brow literature? Plus there are SO many little side-stories, all these secondary characters we’re supposed to care about. I’m pretty sure Candance Camp has, like, a dozen books planned for this circle of characters and she wants to make sure that all of them show up and have something to do in every single book but, frankly, I find it really annoying. I mean, yeah, whatever, you don’t just want a heroine who pines away for the hero and does nothing for an entire novel, but let’s leave the secondary characters to their own book and quit clogging up this one. Plus – and this is where I really start to zone out – almost all of the first 200 pages are them attending parties, them interacting with neighbors, them being introduced to Lady So-and-So and it is so ungoldly boring. I mean, who cares? Really? WHO CARES? Who is picking up romance novels and being like, oooh I can’t wait to hear about what this completely random made-up member of the lower elite is up to and how they feel and what kind of parties they attend! Who is doing that?! No one, that’s who. No one is doing that. It’s stupid and it wastes pages and it distracts from the real plot which is WILL THEY OR WON’T THEY DO THE SEX? (They will.) Stop world-building, Candace Camp. If you take all that crap out and double the font size you’d have a totally normal, respectable romance novel and I wouldn’t be yawn-sighing every two pages.

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